My dearest friend Sharon got the call that no mother EVER wants to get. Her eldest son was killed last week in Iraq. I truly can not imagine what she must be going through. I have not spoken to her yet but can’t imagine how I can help but give her a shoulder to cry on. Anthony was thirty-one and has left five children behind. Forgive my language please, but war sucks! If you are the praying kind please say one for this grieving family. http://planetcapra-tricia.blogspot.com/
Today I went to a wonderful birthday party for a friend who is just turning 40. Our other friend told her she needed to get out and take her obituary photo so she can still look good because after 40 it’s all downhill, I guess there’s no hope for me at 48. On to the photos I want to post some more oldies but goodies. I’m reminded of one of my favorite blog sites called Memories are Made of This which is all based on old and some new photos with stories to go with it. What a great idea and truly a great blog. I suggest a visit there.
This first photo is rather unremarkable except I am putting it in to show that back in the early 60′s everyone had to dress up for almost any occasion. This happened to be my family at Thanksgiving at our cousin’s house in Northwest Washington DC. I’m the baby being held by my father with his hand missing the thumb, a WWII injury. The house we spent our holidays in is a small brick colonial which was sold out of the family some years ago and is now worth close to a million dollars. I still can’t believe that.
The second photo was my birthday party at age 3. I’m the one on the middle step with the curly hair. Can you believe the little boys wearing bow ties? Isn’t that hysterical. If you look you can also see the box on the porch where the milk man delivered the milk. I don’t really remember it but noticed it in the photo.
This photo is of me and my brother Christopher. What I like about this one is the car. What memories that old car brings. It was *the* car of my childhood. It was the only car my parent’s bought new their entire lives. That car survived almost 15 years if I remember correctly when it was wrecked by my brother. It had red plastic seats and NO air conditioning. Who cared back then. We piled in with no seat belts and had a grand old time fighting and screaming down the road with the windows all open.
This photo was taken shortly after we moved from New Jersey to Chattanooga, Tennessee which is the place I consider my hometown. That same picnic table I am sitting on was the very one which I thought it would be a good idea to make a slide out of only to end up getting 100′s of splinters in my butt. My mother finally gave up on trying to pick them out and took me to the hospital where they numbed me up and took them all out. At this age I was already starting to look my “tomboyish” self. We were wild children in the 60′s running free with little parental control and lots of free time to organize our own play. It was a nice time to grow up. Thankfully we all survived the time with no seat belts, helmets and God knows what else.
I love this photo which is another seemingly “unremarkable” one. This was our back patio, my mom is looking out the back door and my dad having just come home from work is taking a rare break to just sit with me. I adored my dad and despite his alcoholism he was a great father. I feel bittersweet memories with these simple black and white photos as both my parents are dead now. I think we always feel the loss of our parents no matter how old we are, we are still children inside.
This is our kitchen which remained almost exactly like this until I cleaned out and sold the house after my mom died in 2005. My dad always cooked Sunday brunch which is a tradition I started after he died. Those knotty pine cabinets really date the kitchen but I like them and wow, did they last well!
This last photo is especially memorable. I am the one on the right with my two friends from left Regina and Dixie. We were dressed in our coolest outfits waiting to be taken by Regina’s 19 year old sister to see Donny Osmond and the Osmond Brothers in concert. I’m pretty sure it was 1972. It was truly one of the most exciting moments of my young life, up until that point of course. Regina and I used to have long arguments on who would be the one to marry Donny. I was sure he would choose me but she knew she’d be the one. Funny thing as neither of us was Mormon so we probably didn’t stand a chance but that didn’t stop us from dreaming for one minute. It was a fantastic concert too and we all arrived home in one piece still somewhat hysterical and exhausted. More later.
Mimi
I feel so happy tonight. Last night I went to a once a month prayer meeting which is part of the ecumenical Emmaus community. I can only say that this group is one of the most loving, joyful and spirit filled bunch of people I’ve been associated with. At these meetings there is lots of hugging, singing, honest sharing and eating. I love attending because I feel close to God even though I know God is always with me, sometimes He feels closer when I worship with others.
I enjoy looking over the crowd to see the young 20s with their dreadlocks, the grannies with blue hair, the conservatives, with their sweaters and button up shirts, the suburban moms with a couple of young kids, black and white brothers and sisters alike and one Native brother with a pony tail going all the way down his back. Sometimes I feel slightly out of place being the liberal thinker I can be and yet I know that it really doesn’t matter with this group, they accept me as I am. It warms my heart to pray, sing and hold hands with all God’s children. It gives me hope for the world.
I know Tim whose wife dropped dead some years ago out of the blue, apparently healthy. Tim found another love and partner in his second wife Jan. Both are committed to building God’s Kingdom together. Tim is my older brother, a quiet and unassuming man who for years went weekly to jail to reach out to the lonely young guys there. I got to know Tim in my jail ministry. He is a dear man and I am proud to count him as a friend.
I know Deb who is in her 70′s with a lovely black bouffant and pronounced New York accent, though she lives in the rural part of our county. Deb is a widow who told me that she and her husband were married 52 years. She said they never fought and were blessed with a peaceful, loving marriage. Deb is full of spunk and a love for the Lord. Deb always has a smile and a soft word for anyone who needs encouragement.
I know Marge and Wally who celebrate their birthdays one day apart, Wally’s birthday is today and Marge’s is tomorrow. Marge is a beautiful woman who would happily give you the shirt off her back. Wally is a giant of a man but a kind and gentle soul. Marge and I were comparing notes about life yesterday and counting our blessings, she mentioned that there were people all over the world who had nothing but a cardboard shack to live in, so though she and Wally were boiling water on the stove for a hot shower she felt very blessed to be able to have a hot bath no matter how she had to do it.
I asked her if her hot water heater was broken and she said yes but made no more mention of it. Marge is not in the best of health. She has constant pain in her shoulder. She went to the doctor who told her she does not have arthritis but she still has the pain to deal with. She has other major health issues which clearly affect her daily activities. Suddenly I felt very uncomfortable that she didn’t have a water heater. I decided at that moment that I would help them get a water heater even though I didn’t have the money to just go out and buy one.
Today at church I asked if anyone felt called to donate for their water heater and two people immediately opened up their pockets and gave me a generous donation, still not nearly enough for the appliance. I went home and felt a sort of tension, perhaps a sort of feeling I might have screwed up by getting involved and now getting others involved and making a promise to nobody but myself and yet I just had this committed feeling that it was going to happen. I had decided that somehow they would get this water heater even if I had to pay for it myself with money I don’t have at the moment.
Around lunch time I got a call from someone who had heard my request for donations, he wanted to buy the water heater but did not want his name mentioned. What is amazing to me but shouldn’t be as a faithful person is that in less than 24 hours after I decided that I would get them a water heater they have a brand new one in their home waiting to be installed. I am so moved in the way God worked in this situation. I learned a lesson that I already knew, ask and you shall receive. Marge and Wally had a real need and all I did was voice it publicly and God provided. I am so happy for Wally and Marge. I guess this is a nice birthday for them.
God bless and Merry Christmas to you all.
Mimi
So much is happening during our amazing trip that it is hard to take it all in, never mind try and write thoughts about it but I’ll do my best. We stopped in Tulsa for four whole days because my girls have a wonderful friend there. I didn’t see much of them the whole time I was there. We didn’t do lots of touristy things but we bonded with another family and frankly that can be better than the most exciting tourist spot. We stayed with our good friends the Bowles and just fit in like family. We ate well, laughed well, worked in the garden together and talked about our hopes and dreams. Isn’t that what people have done since they arrived on the planet? It was great and we were sad to leave.
We did do something rather unusual while in Tulsa we ventured to the Land of the Tigers better known as Safari’s. The Bowles girls have an unusual affinity for nature and all creatures great and small and both work at Safari’s. The elder sister has a love of animals I have only seen a few times in my travels; her life is animals. She has found her life’s passion and is fully immersed in it. From the age of 12 she has worked at Safari’s. She knows all the animals there on a first name basis. She took us on a special tour where we were able to hold lemurs, hang out with wolves, pet skunks, play with foxes, stroke a bobcat and feed lions and tigers. It’s one thing to go to the zoo but to see these creatures up close is quite different. Most of the animals come to them from people who have tried to keep them as pets and have found, for example that tigers don’t make such great pets after all. Here are some photos of our trip there.
Lemur on Jenna's head
Gertrude pet skunk, minus her stinker.
Me petting a kangaroo
Mia with a coatimundi
Cutest little fennec fox I ever did see
Anna feeding a tiger
Sara petting a wolf
Mia feeding a liger, and yes there really are ligers.
"I wished I’d a knowed more people. I would of loved ‘em all. If I’d a knowed more, I woulda loved more. Toni Morrison.
There are some wonderful people in this world, some people I truly admire even though they may not be my best friends but I can honestly say I am glad I know them. The following are all real people not characters made up by me, I don’t have that much imagination. I would like to post photos of these people but since I didn’t get their permission you’ll have to form a picture in your mind.
Sharon is my friend and I love Sharon. Sharon watched her father die of a heart attack when she was a small girl. Her mother died also when she was a child and so Sharon and her brother were raised in foster care. Sharon has, in my opinion, a right to be mad and angry but she is not. She wasn’t always treated well in foster care. People didn’t care whether she saw her father die or not, they also didn’t care that she was in need of some love. She told me that some of the foster parents really tried but mostly they wanted some extra income.
Sharon has severe asthma. When I first got to know her I was constantly worried about her breathing as she seemed to be always out of breath. She just lives with it and doesn’t complain. She is always thinking about others. She is a giving, loving person. Sharon did not get the best education and sadly her brother is in jail but she is such a wise woman. She is quiet about it too so mostly I think people pass her by as uneducated. I am so glad I took a second look and discovered what a wonderful person she is and all the things she can teach me.
Best of all Sharon is hysterical. She makes people laugh. I personally think laughter is about the best damn thing around. It certainly is better than smoking or drinking, it’s free and the benefits just keep on giving and fortunately it is "catching". They say that laughing massages your internal organs. I’m glad I know people like Sharon who keep me laughing. I need to give Sharon a call and invite her over.
Mickey is another person I’m fortunate to have met. Mickey and Sharon have something in common they are humble. Mickey never "toots her own horn" so to speak. She is also a very giving person. I do not know about Mikey’s childhood but I do know that despite the fact that she has had brain surgery and suffers from a number of other ailments when Katrina struck the Gulf Coast Mickey and her husband and some kids she gathered packed it in and went to help. Mickey has gone back several times since and this time when they were there her husband needed emergency bypass surgery but she still has a smile on her face. She doesn’t seem to have any limitations despite all that goes on around her. I am grateful to know Mickey.
Wilford and Mary are a beautiful couple I know. Mary is radiant despite the fact that she shakes uncontrollably when she speaks. She has a sort of glow around her that is hard to explain and her enthusiasm for life and people is contagious even though it can be a challenge to understand what she is saying. Yesterday Mary told me that she and Wilfred, now grandparents, had managed to squirrel away just enough money to fix their leaking roof when they found that their grandchildren needed money for their graduation. They prayed about it as Mary said and gave the money to the grandchildren. Mary said they’d just have to move the bed so it doesn’t get wet when it rains.
Perhaps if you’re like me you’re thinking let the kids pay for it themselves, how did they incur these debts anyway but I just look at what hearts people have and say, gosh, you are way more loving than I am. Mary asked me to pray for her so if you’re the praying type say one for Mary and Wilford. I admire this couple for being willing to sacrifice in such a way, I don’t think I could, even though I would like to think I would.
The last friend I’d like to introduce today is Scott. Scott is a young man I met in jail. He is 20 years old and was as he put it a "gang banger". I am so glad I got to meet Scott. He is wise beyond his years. If I had been Scott I would be dead I’m sure. He learned to survive in what amounts to be a war zone and not only has he survived but he has prospered. He did come to realize that he needed to do something with his energy and talent other than collect guns, tattoos and live a life of crime, not necessarily because he wanted to but because he doesn’t have much other choice in jail.
Scott is very smart but I’m not sure if he realizes just how smart he is, I hope there are people in jail who can tell him that but I also know he must pay for his crimes and it isn’t their job in jail to tell young men how smart they are. However, while in jail he has completed his GED and is taking college courses. He told me he wants to go to High Schools and talk about his life on the street. He wants to help other kids stay out of trouble.
When Scott was 8 years old his mother who was a crack head walked out on him and his two siblings, one 12 and one 6 or so. She never came back. Like Sharon he doesn’t complain over his misfortune but doesn’t deny it either. Perhaps it is these stories that make people like Scott so strong. The children survived for three weeks with out a parent but then were taken and put in foster homes. Scott admitted he constantly ran away from his foster homes and was happier living under a bridge with his younger brother. I can’t pretend to understand what he went through or goes through I am only very glad I got to meet Scott and I hope that one day he will get to live out his dreams outside of the bars.
There are just so many wonderful people in this world and I’m glad I’ve decided I want to meet as many as I can. I think sometimes we think I only have enough love or energy to devote to just the people in my small group but the way I see it is love is a sort of paradox, the more you give the more you receive. It is limitless. While I’m not on a wild chase to "collect friends". I will try and be open when I meet new people to the possibilities of a friendship or at least to recognize that there is so much to learn in everyone we meet.
Mimi
Well aren’t I just the prolific writer. Actually I’ve had some photos for a week and just wanted to post them because they came out well. Being the chatty type person I am, I am forever meeting new people. I know I do embarrass my children talking to every stranger I meet, and what a horrible example to them I am, but, oh well, life remains interesting this way.
I befriended a wonderful lady at Walmart. She moved here a couple of years ago from outside Boston. She told me she is retired and doesn’t really need to work but does need to get out of the house. We have chatted over the grocery cart on all matter of subjects which is what I love, talking about everything. She inherited her Father’s small house on about 2 acres of land out in the country and she has said she wanted me and the girls to come for a visit. Well she has been caring for her son’s puppy while he was away and so it was the perfect time for a visit.
She called at dinner last week and I was dragging my feet about cooking the spaghetti anyway so I said,
Come on girls, we’re going to visit Pat,” and off we went. The following are photos we took while there playing with what she calls a puggle, a beagle pug mix. Being a puppy she is bursting with energy and my children being children, even the 14 year old are also bursting with energy so it was a great mix, the dog and the kids got some romp time and a good time was had by all.
